Walk Through Memory Lane

Emma has done a wonderful job describing how, in a matter of minutes, she recently changed a very devastating school memory into a wonderful fun filled experience.

If you want to find out how...

I invite you to read through to the end :)

By Emma Blount:
One weekend I felt isolated and unloved while trying to plan a lunch party.

I comforted myself by numbing out on the "Friends" sitcom until 3am.

While doing this a painful memory surfaced..

I was nine at the time.

In this memory, the teacher told me to open the drawer.

And I saw it..

The popularity chart for our class. 

A diagram clearly showing that half the class disliked me.

And even worse, the one girl I thought was my friend...didn't.

In that moment a deep searing of shame washed over me, reinforcing a perception of myself as of one who was rejected and unliked.

I knew immediately if I didn't want that belief about myself to plague me for the rest of my life, I needed to use a simple tool that Dorothy had taught me, replacing my painful memory with a better, imagined scenario.

So, putting into practice what I had learned, I pictured my adult self going up to my hurting nine year old with huge love and compassion…and giving her a hug.

I also spoke to her lovingly, in my imagination, looking my nine-year-old self in the eye and saying: 

“Darling, I’m so sorry this happened”.

“The teacher should have NEVER shown you this chart. That was very cruel of him. You must be so hurt.

You ARE loved, sweetie, you are loved by me, your 55 year old self.

And you are loved by Jesus!”

I helped my nine-year old self to forgive the teacher and the other children.

I RENOUNCED the lie that I am not liked and I told that lie to go to the foot of the cross...NOW, in Jesus name!

I REFRAMED my identity as a precious and loved daughter of God, not defined by the perception of others any more.

And what I loved the most about this exercise...

Was that deep down inside myself, I could feel something shifting.

POSTSCRIPT: I am continuing to reinforce the truth that I am loved by God and myself by spending regular, peaceful times relaxing in my own presence, doing the things that I enjoy.

Because of this my peace and confidence have increased.

And during that same weekend of the hurtful memory surfacing, I followed through by hosting a really fun, happy lunch party attended by eight friends who were all just as nice as the characters in the "Friends" sitcom.

And you know what?

They all like me and so do I :)

POST POST SCRIPT: Trauma neuron pathways can’t tell the difference between real and imagined events. They are outside of time. Therefore, when you replace a painful memory in picture form with a life-giving one, the brain no longer hangs onto the old and ugly, believing that the new is true.