Grace Under Fire

There are times in the past when I have not appreciated how God has worked in my life. This is only because I did not understand what God was trying to do for me.

In the long run it was an act of kindness, but in the immediate moment it seemed anything but.

Time and time again I would get frustrated with God because He would refuse to rescue me. I found He would comfort and encourage me, but even when my back was up against the wall and felt like I was drowning, that’s right, God refused to rescue me. 

The truth was, God believed in me when I did not believe in myself.

He knew that He had placed a warrior within me and only the pressure of going beyond my comfort zone would allow me to become that person.

Let me back up a bit…

As a youngster, I had discovered that being the youngest of six had some distinct advantages. 1. I always had someone to help me out and 2. they would do it for me if I indicated it was to hard for me.

Later, as an adult, God knew that this pattern of being rescued would become a handicap because I would give up too easily and wait for someone to do just that…rescue me.

Over the years because of my ignorance of God’s ways, it felt like God didn’t care or had abandoned me. Wasn’t God supposed to “rescue” me? Today I call this my “Cinderella” mentality.

Finally, in my latter years I understood that God did love me because He loved me enough to grow me up.

Just like you cannot give a two-year-old the car keys to drive with, neither would God give me responsibility that I was not ready to handle.

It was in the struggle of scrambling to survive that I learned to become tenacious and tap into something deep within; and for that I am grateful.

So, the next time you feel like God has abandoned or rejected you, think twice and ask yourself if God’s stepping back is really about the process of maturing and training you for bigger and better things?

Choose to also reframe it. See it as He is training your hands to war so that you can secure the fullness of your God given inheritance. 

I know for me this made all the difference in the world, and today I am so glad that God loved me enough not to rescue me.

Do I still whine and complain? Yes. But I know that my God loves me and that makes all the difference in the world to walking through difficult scenarios.

If you enjoyed this blog, be sure to check out my next one: The Promise That Has Been Sown into Your Name.